Back in the Days When He Drank A Lot and Passed out on Staircases I Never Dreamed He'd Be Saying These Things

Keith: What are you doing?

Me: Watching America's Next Top Model and grading papers. What are you doing?

Keith: Driving to Swiss Chalet to pick up chicken.

Me: Did the baby finally roll over and say, "I'm sick of the boob. Go get me some chicken!"

Keith: Noooo. He doesn't get the boob.

Me: Oh. Yes. Right.

Keith: (thoughtfully) Although the other day he did try to get at mine while we were sitting on the couch. I mean, not the nipple exactly, but the general boob area. He was definitely trying to get my general boob area.