Best Rumor EVER

So I have an upper-level creative writing class this semester, and here's the thing: I am in love with that class. It's a particularly deep and soulful love, and I spend a lot of time thinking how I'd like to fly that class to Vegas, get it drunk, and then marry it.

Today I was headed to this class, and I passed the chair of the department in the hall. She'd been teaching in the room where I'd be teaching in a few minutes.

She grinned at me. "There is a pretty big rumor about you being spread around," she said.

"What?" I said. I was trying to figure out what was so rumor-worthy about me. Earlier, I'd caught a few minutes of Scrubs while I was eating my breakfast, and on that episode Carla was spreading a rumor that the hot new Latina nurse used to be a dude. I hoped no one was trying that with me.

"Just wait until you get into class!" the chair said, and then she was gone and I was left to face my students.

"WHAT?" I demanded as I crossed the threshold. "WHAT IS GOING ON?"

(I did not add, "DOES ANYONE IN THIS ROOM THINK I USED TO BE A DUDE?")

"YOU!" one of the girls shouted. She pointed accusingly at me. "YOU ARE ENGAGED!"

I almost fell over. "What?" I asked.

"People are saying you got engaged!" she said. "To some hockey player! A guy who plays for the Sabres!"

"RYAN MILLER!" I said.

"YES!" she said. "The goalie!"

And then I shrieked. And jumped up and down. A lot. "THAT IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD!" I said. Of course, what made it good, what made it really fucking good, was that people--multiple people--apparently believed it.

So, to celebrate my engagement, here's a picture of my fiance with some random animals dressed in hockey jerseys:



God, that boy can wear a suit. Mercy.